This article is taken from the March 2025 issue of The Critic. To get the full magazine why not subscribe? Right now we’re offering five issues for just £10.
“Damn braces,” wrote William Blake, “Bless relaxes.” Philip Larkin ordered it differently: “We should be kind whilst there is still time.” Is politeness, or civility, desirable? Some years ago, at a literary festival, a testy political commentator was asked that by the kind of lady (pleasant, well-spoken, engaged) who attends such shindigs. Ian Dunt replied: “I have always thought politeness is a bourgeois construct.” It sounded like an emphatic “no”.
Lefties, on the whole, are less inclined to offer a sympathetic ear to those who see the world through another lens. The teenage controversialist Owen Jones probably emerged from the womb denouncing Israel. Paul Mason, the Trotsky of the East Lancs Road, sounds permanently enraged.
Charles Moore, by contrast, starts from the premise that different people may hold different views. Rod Liddle, who began life on the other side of the fence, is often extremely funny, and certainly chooses his targets carefully. “Batey” Jones and po-faced Mason, to borrow one of Alan Bennett’s most effective lines, see jokes strictly by appointment.
On Word of Mouth, Radio 4’s weekly investigation of language, Michael Rosen talked about, or around, “politeness” with a professor of sociolinguistics from the University of Nottingham. Sadly, Louise Mullany did not greet him with “eh up, me duck”, as all self-respecting Nottingham people should. What a swizz. She spoke instead of “appropriacy” — not the sort of word often heard by the banks of the Trent.
Rosen, rising to the challenge, referred to “contestatory” statements, so their conversation went to a tie-break, which the lady clinched by pronouncing “celebratory” in the American manner. That kind of thing plays well on Radio 4, so she can expect to be invited back.
It wasn’t a bad show. Rosen, who is not always kind to others, let his guest talk, which she did in a rather excitable way. Swearing, we were told, was not always impolite. When people know one another well, socially or in a work context, rude words could amuse, not offend.
All men and women, said the professor, had a “back stage” and a “front stage” in their lives. In old money that means “private” and “public”, a distinction usually absorbed by the time children enter secondary school. So, whilst there was a lot of hot air, the balloon remained earthbound.
The problem with Word of Mouth is that everything has been said, many times over. But as Rosen is one of Radio 4’s favoured voices, the high-ups find it difficult to bundle him out of the building. The week before the linguistics lady he met the Scottish poet Jackie Kay, whose appearances on shows of this kind are not exactly rare. She belongs to a fairly small repertory company of approved performers.
Europe is where Adler the linguist feels at home. Or, to be precise, the European Union
Here’s one to ponder. If Rosen, an unabashed Corbynite, kicked with his right foot as vigorously as he does with his left, would he get so many opportunities?
Mishal Husain has left the BBC to join Bloomberg News, so the Today programme is a body light. Whilst she was not pure as the driven snow, as some of the tributes seemed to suggest, she was the least obtrusive presenter on the programme, and spoke the clearest English.
Katya Adler, the BBC’s European editor, was swiftly permitted a few gallops as part of a public audition, she and didn’t sound all that comfortable in “the hot seat”. Her script-reading was hurried and imprecise, and as usual on Today there was too much joshing with colleagues. Listeners do not want to know she has three cats, or that she talks to them when she rolls home from the pub.
Adler also made an unconvincing presenter of the BBC Proms coverage on the box two years back, so perhaps she’s better off sur le continent, as Jimmy Young used to say on his Radio 2 show in the dim and distant. Not all skills are portable. Europe is where Adler the linguist feels at home. Or, to be precise, the European Union.
Which means there is a vacancy alongside Nick “Stretford ender” Robinson, Amol “glottal stopper” Rajan and the sharp-elbowed Emma Barnett. If those three rode into town and hitched up their horses outside the marshal’s office, even the James Gang might think twice.
Rajan was at his sparkling best talking to Bill Gates, casually referring to Gramsci, as lads from Tooting often do. Gates took it in his stride, having been briefed, no doubt, about the golden boy’s intellectual capability.
Of course Robinson and pals have certain talents. Three hours of news and analysis first thing in the morning is a mighty stretch, and Today is not all bad. But there are too many soft features, about “slebs” from popular entertainment and sport, and the tone is often too breezy. A producer might also have a word about the cult of personality, and the dangers thereof. It’s not all about you, darling.
